Review of 'Walking Dead'

Zombie Mondays

 

(Editor's comment: the following is a review and does not necessarily releflect the opinions of Geeksagogo or Zombie  Mondays)

 

Hello, Walking Dead fans!  Still with us? 

 

Good!

 

Okay…these folks all need haircuts.  And a facial scrub.  There’s well-stocked and unstaffed pharmacies all over the place and they have running water.  There’s no electricity, no alarms, and no police.  So there’s no excuse to let themselves get all dirty and gross like they have.  If they don’t want a haircut, they could at lease drag a comb through their unshorn mops now and then.

 

Kool (Hand Rick) and the Gang have returned from murdering an innocent bunch of sleeping Saviors and

life has returned to what passes for normal in the post zombie apolcalyptic world.  Eugene, being the big picture idea man that he is, suggests they start manufacturing their own ammunition, both to trade and to use for themselves.  Given the rate at which they burn through ammo, this is an outstanding idea.  Easy, too.  Everything you need can be had at Cabelas™, America’s favorite outdoor store!  Talk to a sales representative today!

 

There’s really not a lot to it…

 

Doctor Denise, fresh from celebrating her first walker “kill” with a very uninspired speech, takes a crossbow bolt through the head (honestly, this stuff just doesn’t surprise me, anymore).  Eugene, Rosita, and Daryl are then captured by some neck beard whose name eludes me.   Eugene finally finds his gonads and, with distendible jaws like a goblin shark, bites the gonads off of Neck beard, leading to another full auto firefight.  Neckbeard and crew is chased off.  Much respect, Eugene.  Mucho respecto.

 

Eugene Porter, ver. 2.0

 

(Yes, this is a real thing)

 

Until Eugene gets his ammunition loading venture together, the group may need to start improvising.  May I suggest:

 

FLYING GUILLOTINE!

 

Lethality: high

Learning curve: very high

Practicality: none

 

BLADED NUNCHAKU!

 

Lethality:

                Self: high

                Other guy: less high

                Learning curve: are you kidding?

                Practicality: ladies dig it

 

(I like nunchuks.  One of only a few weapons more dangerous to the guy using it than the guy he’s using it on.  Blades can only multiply this effect.) 

 

Basic rock:

 

Lethality: varies

Learning curve: fast

Practicality: smashing, throwing, hammering, skipping…it’s the multi-tool of the apocalypse!

 

Sadly and confusingly, Rick, Glen, and Maggie don’t make a showing this week.  With only a few more shows left this season, we can only assume they’re cooking up something big!

 

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